from Fashion to Confusion…

hmm..posting after a while now..been to kerala for a 3 day visit and done quite a lot in that short period which by the way i don’t usually do..couldn’t spend much time at home as i wanted to especially with my cousin at home for study leave..managed to find time to watch a madhur bhandarkar movie “fashion” one night and it was just great stuff..almost made me wish i had the looks to be a model or the talent to be a photographer or at least the money to organize and sponsor a fashion show..hmm, every movie i see gives me new dreams to dream..and thats why i love movies πŸ™‚


and then what else did i do? well, mainly got to see more of my relatives in 3 days than i usually see in 3 months, maybe more…there was that initial cold welcome at the place i usually stay as usual which i knew would either get colder or warmer according to my own actions…it did get warmer a bit sooner; no doubt due to the fact that i made it clear i wasnt staying long enough to disturb my cousin’s “study” leave..paid a visit to my ‘home’ and ended up having to unload a truck load of roof tiles with my poor cousin and the truck driver and his ‘kili’..that led to my bathing at ‘home’ which i havent done since my parents left india…that felt good 😐
then…visited my eccentric father’s brother’s family, stayed there..more like just slept there…did think of waking up early at least from there but despite an overseas call from my ma, i still managed to stay in bed till 10 am…i was in for a rude shock when i got downstairs and realised that i was alone in the house..the first thought that came to me was ‘ok i come and stay here once in a blue moon but they cant have forgotten i was sleeping upstairs and they cant have locked me in and gone out and continued with their lives as usual !’ but then i decided to think rationally and deduced that my aunt might have gone to her school and cousin sis might have gone for some special classes and assumed my uncle must be somewhere out in the toilet or garden…i check the back door and found it wasnt locked and heaved a sigh of constipated relief as i really wanted to unload my after all that and brushing my teeth i found my uncle coming back from a neighbours place where he had gone to attend some funeral..hmm… 😑
went to my bro’s fiancees place with uncles family..the marriage date hasnt been fixed yet and i have already been there maybe 6 or 7 times or more..i wouldnt go if i hadnt liked the family as a whole..but they are warm and i dont feel bad whatever some might say aout my visiting them so often, i don’t care much about “traditional” customs anyway..sometimes i just wish their younger daughter had been anything other than a girl studying to be doctor so that i could have married into the same family as my bro for i hate too many relatives and i am not comfortable with the idea of having a doctor for a wife..thats totally not the way, the food was great as usual, a little too spicy for me but still good.. πŸ™‚
then finally, the one big reason why i felt i had to go to my hometown; my on-off girlfriend..nothing much really, just wanted to update our status of being on or off currently for the benefit of our mutual friends..took an appointment mutually agreeable, met at a local ‘cool’ bar, ordered 2 of what the menu referred to as ‘fruit’ ‘icecream’ ‘salad’, struggled to finish the icecream while she struggled to finish the fruits in between small talk of what i thought was big talk..finally left after the waiters twice checked for the bill money and gave us enough subtle hints that we had overstayed for the 100 rupee order we had placed and which by the way we hadnt finished..and it wasnt just the salad we couldnt finish but our talk too…with no option left, continued our talk along the road till she concluded that this wasn’t the time for both of us to be thinking too much on commitment when our future was at stake because of our career or rather lack of career.. i felt, if not anything else, then ‘confusion’ was certainly one thing that we both had in common…and soooo…thats that and im back in bangalore a bit more confused than i already had been… 😦



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